Friday, May 18, 2007
This is important!
I feel I should make this public: I feel great. Not like, oh man, I'm tired, but I have enough energy to move from my bed to the couch; not like, oh man, I think I could walk to the park down the street; and definitely not like, oh man, I feel like sitting in my backyard watching the robin attack the chipmunk (which he does. It's amusing.). But really, I feel just about normal. I think most people expect me to be somewhat weathered or ill-looking, and there is a small level of surprise when they see me and I look like anybody else. I know it must be difficult to visualize my life right now, despite my excellent descriptions of everything (haha). If you're reading this from halfway across the country and you haven't seen me since December or longer, you have probably formed a general mental picture of me right now. Whether I'm thinner or fatter or yellower or paler or possibly somewhat taller is up to you. Possibly I'm wearing sweatpants and a sweatshirt, just sort of lying around, trying not to freeze. That wouldn't be wholly inaccurate, although I can't remember the last time I wore sweatpants. For the most part though, I'm doing a bad job at playing the role of a sick kid. I am desperately trying to be Caroline-trendy, which is pretty different from trendy-trendy, but I like it, and I think I'm succeeding. I still do my push ups and crunches; gotta keep that six-pack. And, right now at least, I'm pretty sure my blood counts are all normal, so there is no extreme paleness going on. And like I said, I feel great. The fatigue of the past few weeks is all but gone. Tomorrow I am going back to my highschool again; it's my dad's reunion. So it's going to be a great weekend as well. And don't worry about me. If you saw me on the street, I know you would be thinking, "Oh man, who is that hot chick walking my way?" You wouldn't think, "Dude, that chick totally has cancer." That's what I imagine anyway. Next week when I go back in the hospital, we can all have a little sad-Caroline time, but for now, live in the present, and join me in enjoying it. That's all. Have a wonderful weekend. Pax.